How To Manage Your Money As A Couple

A quarter of couples find themselves arguing about money at least once a week, according to research from Aviva, whether that’s about bills, the mortgage or childcare. And the cost of living crisis isn’t helping. With money not stretching as far arguments can happen very easily. There are many ways to manage your money as a couple, and there’s no one-size-fits-all approach.

I’ve spoken about the methods that work for me and Luke, but the approach won’t work for everyone. But there are some principles that you should maintain to manage your money better as a couple.

Manage your money better with open communication

If you know you want to have a conversation about money gather your thoughts beforehand. Discussing money can be an emotional topic and going in without thinking can lead to more arguments. There may be lots of things you need to discuss which may become overwhelming, so consider the biggest or most important topics.

Don’t just launch into a conversation about money if it’s not a natural conversation topic. Check you’re both in the right headspace for the chat, and if not pick a time that may work better. The more relaxed you both are the more productive your conversation with be.

Discuss who’s in charge of what

While it might seem tempting it’s a bad idea to let one person handle all of the finances as this creates an imbalance and can cause issues further down the line. Research from Hargreaves Landsdown round that only 44% of people share the responsibility of day-to-day finances with their partnership. So if one half of the partnership wasn’t around any more half of people would be thrown in at the deep end.

Splitting financial tasks, or even better doing it together, will mean you both know what’s going on and there’s no temptation for one person to blame the one who has more control for any financial issues. All relationships eventually end – either through a split or a bereavement – and that would be the worst possible time to have to get your head around the finances as well.

Make sure you discuss what your roles will be and if there are any tasks to split out. For example, is one of you in charge of the grocery shopping and that budget, or is one of you in charge of keeping up-to-date with your home insurance policies?

Manage your money better by accepting that you’re both different

It’s rare that a couple have the exact same outlook on money. For some people, money is a way to experience life to the fullest, and for others, it’s a way of providing safety and security. Your outlooks don’t need to align, and the sooner you accept your differences the easier it will be to manage your money. It can be beneficial to have different attitudes as it will bring financial balance to your relationship.

Luke is more spontaneous with spending and he helps me to treat myself and not constantly say no to spending. And I am very much a planner and a saver, so I help him to think ahead and stay organised.

What happens if one of you earns considerably more than the other?

There’s no rule of what you should do in this situation, but as a couple you need to have an open discussion and come up with a plan that suits you both.

Some couples would split expenses based on salary, so if one person earns £40,000 and the other £60,000, the one earning more would pay 60% of expenses, and the other 40%. Whereas some may still split things 50/50. And others may just pool all their money together so the wage difference isn’t even a consideration as it’s all both of your money.

Do you need a joint account to manage your money?

A lot of people rely on a combination of different accounts with a joint account for household spending, and separate accounts for personal money. But there’s no rule that says you even need to have a joint account.

It’s so easy to set up payments and transfer money that you may find it easier to keep things separate and remain financially independent. Just make sure you’re both happy with the approach you choose.

If you’re in a relationship how do you manage your money as a couple?