Are You Comfortable Talking About Money?

I always find it bizarre that so many people out there are so uncomfortable talking about money. In my friendship group, for example, I don’t have the foggiest idea about what people may earn and how their finances are doing. Personally, I find that quite strange as I’m quite comfortable talking about money. Research from Topcashback found that if people had to speak to someone about money almost two-fifths would not talk to their friends at all. And partners came in the most favourable to discuss money and finances with. For most though (70%) they trust the internet to find financial advice. I’d assume this is because it’s less personal and online financial advice can be faceless.

When me and Luke first started dating we were really open talking about money and how much we earnt. While it wasn’t a deal-breaker we wanted to be sure our financial lives compatible as well. Research has found that a third of Brits find it awkward or different to discuss their financial situation. But how comfortable are you talking about money?

What makes us feel uncomfortable when finances come into play?

In the research by Topcashback, they found that two-thirds of people believe that people aren’t open with their finances due to fear or embarrassment. People out there are worried about feeling ashamed about how much they earn. I think this is actually more damaging than talking about it. There’s no shame in earning less than someone else as everyone’s situation is different. You may earn enough to pay for everything you need and not be motivated to earn more. You may be in a job starting at the bottom as it’s a business or role you’re passionate about. If you’re working hard then there’s no shame in what you earn.

When we grow up we have to think about what we want to do when we’re older. But as no one talks about wages and earnings we don’t know what our aspirations could mean. While we should seek a career because it interests us or we’re passionate about it. We should also think about whether this can financially sustain us.

When it comes to the freelance world people don’t always know if it’s a viable option as fewer people discuss the realities of it. I absolutely love the freelancers/ influencers out there who are transparent about money like Patricia Bright. Hearing how others make their money really helps give me ideas for things I could try or avenues which are worth looking into. I don’t want to be a full-time freelancer but for others sharing this information can give them hope. Hope that it’s possible to make it.77% of people in the research did acknowledge the benefits of talking about money saying that they could learn something new in the process.

Are you comfortable talking about money?

When it comes to money I am pretty open about talking about it. When I have moved jobs in the past I have spoken about how much extra I’d be earning with my family. Although the people I was most open with were my colleagues, especially those at the same level as me. Although the research from Topcashback revealed that having an open discussion about finances was seen as almost as taboo as discussing sex and relationships which to be is a really old-fashioned mindset to have.

I spoke to some fellow bloggers about how comfortable they are talking about money and there was quite a divide. Some people find it quite tough like Kieran “for me personally it’s that fear of judgement. Either being considered as bragging or not having enough money/ spending the money I do have on the wrong things. I wish I was more comfortable but those conversations in the past have soured very quickly and left me feeling insecure.” Fear of judgement seems to be quite a common theme when it comes to why people don’t want to talk about money.

While Vicky has firsthand experience of how speaking about money can be a huge benefit “I never talked openly about my struggle with money until I really needed help. I had bailiffs at my front door and didn’t know what to do. I’d been pretending for so long that I could afford the things I was doing. I called a friend in front of the bailiffs and she lent me £1300 without a second thought. That was the moment I decided that I would talk more openly about money to people. Money struggles are nothing to be ashamed of.”

Some people like Tina are quite comfortable though “I’m always open and honest about money, both with adults and my kids. I make sure my daughter understands I work hard for our money and that we have to save up to buy the things we want. She’s 7 and gets great satisfaction out of saving her spends up to buy something she wants.”

How to become more comfortable talking about money

Be honest with yourself

There’s no point starting to discuss money with others if you’re not honest with yourself. Have a real hard look at your financial state, your debts and your earnings. Make sure you’re 100% familiar and comfortable talking about money with yourself, to begin with. If you don’t know the ins and outs of your finances no one else can come close.

Budget and plan your money

Chances are you’ll feel more comfortable talking about money if you’re comfortable with your financial situation. If you feel in control of your finances you’ll feel happier talking about them. Thinking about everything from planning your personal budget to nailing your payday routine. Even if you’re self-employed there are ways to plan your money better.

Start the conversation today

Begin the discussion early. Reach out to friends, family, colleagues or your partner and begin the discussion. While people might not be receptive at first they’re more likely to start being honest if you’re open and comfortable talking about money yourself. It might take time to get into a really open discussion but it will feel liberating afterwards.

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