Questions To Ask Yourself To Improve Your Relationship With Money

Your relationship with money is one of the longest relationships you’ll have.

Like any other relationship, things won’t always be easy. Sometimes you’ll fall out; other times, you won’t understand it. You can’t live without it, but living in harmony isn’t always easy.

One key way to balance your relationship with money is understanding it better. By answering some key questions about money, you can improve your relationship.

Are you being honest with yourself about money?

It’s easy to bury your head in the sand and avoid looking at your account and savings, but you’re only cheating yourself.

To have a good relationship with money, you must be honest and know your position. Are you living beyond your means and spending money you don’t have? Or are you saving so much as you never feel secure?

If you’re finding it hard to be honest about your money, you need to think about why this might be. Maybe you’re emotionally spending or rewarding yourself for getting through something tough. By identifying the behaviour, you can replace it with something else.

What role does money play in your well-being? What’s more important to you, money or happiness?

We all need money to keep a roof over our heads, the bills paid, and food in our fridge. But you need to figure out the role money plays for you and its importance.

According to the Joseph Rowntree Foundation the minimum income needed for an acceptable living standard is £25,000 for a single person and £43,000 for a family of four. But with the cost of living rising, chances are we all need and want a bit extra.  A lot of research points out that when you hit a certain amount of money, getting more doesn’t make you happy.

But think about what is important to you. Do you want to earn and have as much money as possible? Or do you want to have enough to live and be happy? Money can contribute to your life, but it can’t provide it.

Would you be happier if you took a pay cut at work to change your career? Or perhaps going part-time is better for your happiness, but you still earn enough. Knowing what is important to you will help your relationship with money. I would love to go part-time work one day, but I would only do this when I am on a high enough salary.

Is your relationship with money triggered by something?

A lot of different things can trigger negative feelings around money. And getting triggered can cause you to overspend or make rash decisions when it comes to money. Knowing what these triggers are can help manage your relationship with money.

Social media and seeing how others live may be a trigger. Or seeing a family member who is struggling may trigger you into wanting to help, even though you can’t afford to. Or you may even be triggered by arguing with your partner about money.

Money should be a tool to help enhance your mood and enable you to do things. But sometimes, we can be made to feel guilty about treats or having fun with our money. We have a few bigger holidays booked over the next 18 months, and sometimes I feel guilty about this as I know we should probably be saving, investing or paying the money off our mortgage. But the holidays are good for my mental well-being; we deserve them.

Do you feel responsible when it comes to money?

It doesn’t matter how old I am, sometimes I just feel like a kid, and I wonder how I got this much responsibility. Keeping track of your own finances is a huge responsibility, especially if you have a family to support.

Having a budget is such an important tool for being responsible with money. Ensuring that all your bills, essential savings and debt is paid off before you frivolously spend is a way of being responsible.

Don’t give yourself a hard time if you make a childish or emotional decision sometimes. I know there have been times when I’ve splurged £100 on Pop Vinyl figures and then really had to look at myself. Or I’ve gone severely over budget on eating out.

You’ve learnt from this as long as you acknowledge the less ‘responsible’ spending and try to factor it into future budgets.

How do you feel your relationship is money is?

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